Like stupid gay, not gay gay.

Alright, so DC Comics has decided to make The Green Lantern a homosexual. To be honest I am at a loss with this.

At first I was annoyed because well, people need to stop making everything "gay." Especially in this situation. Unless these comic books featuring a gay Green Lantern are also going to depict graphic butt sex and the occasional drawn in cameo by whatever pop diva the gay community is obsessed with that week, I just can't see them being all that interested in reading a comic book. So basically, DC Comics has just managed to make a lot of lonely straight dudes feel really uncomfortable in their parents basement. Way to go.

Then I thought to myself: Well, a lot of kids read comics books and it might help a lot of sexually confused youth feel more comfortable with themselves. Oh wait, no. Now any kid carrying a Green Lantern comic book is going to be a target as well and the only self defense they will have learned from reading about the Green Lantern is to put on a big tacky ring and try to use it to make things happen. So, steal your moms jewelry and defend yourself with jazz hands.

Finally, I decided it was actually a very subtle homophobic move on DC Comics' part. I mean come on! You couldn't make Batman just admit he is gay? Batman already seems pretty gay so it would have made total sense. No, the new Batman films are way too lucrative to mess up the image of Bruce Wayne. So instead they make the Green Lantern a homo, conveniently after the movie came out and totally sucked.

"Whoa guys, that Green Lantern movie was pretty bad. How are we ever going to make a come back after that?"

"Oh I know, we will give him to the gays! The gays love men in spandex pants!"

Well, you're right DC. We do. But it doesn't change the fact that I am on to your ways.

Really....magical....?


Sigh.